Update on Jason's Illness

Jason called me at work today. He told me I needed to come home (he had not gone to work because he was sick). This actually scared me. So, I got him to the doctor and expected to hear that he had the flu. Nope, pneumonia!! Good news is, he isn’t contagious. Bad news is, if he isn’t getting better by Wednesday morning (when I take him back to the doctor) he may have to go into the hospital.

Weekend To Do and Ta Da Lists

To Do

· 8-10 loads of laundry
· reload closet (it was emptied due to being painted earlier in the week)
· reload the linen closet
· clean up the nursery (it was trashed when everything was thrown into it due to having our master bed and bath painted earlier in the week)
· grocery shopping
· hang curtain rods
· hang curtains
· pick out and purchase new comforter and shams for master bedroom (to go with new paint color)
· pick out and purchase new bathroom accessories (to go with new paint color)
· buy new towels (just because we need some and I do like to have one set that coordinates in each bathroom)
· touch up ceiling in guest/Dylan’s bathroom ( I got paint on the ceiling when I painted that bathroom almost a year ago. I think it’s about time to fix it)
· reload Dylan’s toys into his toy closet (the closet under the stairs – they were thrown into the dining room due to the closet being painted earlier in the week)


Ta Da

· 2 loads of laundry
· Jason reloaded his part of the closet, but we never got around to mine
· Minor grocery shopping (just enough to get by)
· Picked out, but did not purchase new comforter (couldn’t find shams and Dylan was “done” shopping, so we needed to leave before it got ugly)
· Picked out, but did not purchase new bathroom accessories (the master bath is a color called Camel by Behr [think traditional camel hair jacket], so we are doing the accessories in a chocolate brown color).
· Got Dylan’s hair cut (not on the list of to do’s, but he was overdue)
· Jason and I both got sick (with different things, so now it seems like we gave each other what the other one had), so far it looks like Dylan has been unphased.
· Due to illness, the remainder of the previous list will be delayed until further notice (at least two weeks anyway)

I just want to mention that in the midst of all the illness at our house this weekend (and yesterday was pretty bad), Dylan was a trooper. You know that he had to be bored out of his mind, especially since we didn’t leave the house at all yesterday. He played by himself much of the day, bringing over small toys to interact with us. He watched some movies and took a great nap (which meant I could get a nap also). He really picked up on the fact that we felt bad and took it easy on us (for the most part – I mean, he is only two).

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Strange Men in My House

There are two strange men in my house right now. They are there alone. Don't worry, though. They are painting my master bed and bath and closet, living room, kitchen, hall, pantry, laundry room, and a couple of smaller closets. I can't wait to see the finished product. I hope we like it.

We painted our foyer several months (maybe a year) ago. We love the color of the foyer now, but it didn't seem to flow with the living room and our bedroom. So, we knew at some point we would need to repaint. I hate to paint. So, we agreed that if we could get a good deal, we would hire someone to paint the rooms for us. So, we are getting almost half of our house painted. Scary, but exciting.

And, to top it all off, I get to buy new bedding and we are going to set up a sitting/reading area in our bedroom. I feel like we are on a spending spree. Luckily, we only do this once or twice a year.

Potty Training

Potty training is not going well. I thought we were on our way to the "great, big underwear adventure", but it doesn't seem like Dylan is all that interested right now. He never wants to go potty when I ask, but he wants out of the dirty pull-up almost immediately. His bladder control is pretty good, I think. He can go hours without peeing in his pull-up, but says he doesn't need to go potty. Then, 10 minutes later, he is complaining (and walking really funny) because he is wet or poopy, so maybe that is a step in the right direction.

He seems to do okay at daycare - he goes potty their at least 3 or 4 times a day. Problem is, they usually pull off a wet pull-up and then he goes potty again. So, he can do it, but he still prefers to go in his pull-up.

And as funny as it sounds, I'm not really looking forward to having to scout out the closest potty in each and every store we enter. Pull-ups are great for long trips, you don't have to stop the car every 30 minutes for a potty break. But, once we make the switch to underwear (daytime - naptime/nighttime wear will continue for a while, I'm sure), we will not go back to pull-ups for trips. I just think that would be too confusing. We will, however, invest in a waterproof pad for the carseat. LOL!!

Really, I'm not all that concerned. I know it will happen (and I'm not completely sure that he isn't just testing us - you know, 2 year old stuff) when it happens.

OMG, I am so tired . . .

I am just so tired lately. I'm not really doing anything more than usual, so I just don't get it. I thought I might have a UTI, but the doctor ruled that out on Tuesday. I have been sleeping in Dylan's room the past few nights, but I don't think that is the problem.

Actually, I think we all may sleeping a little better this way. Before I slept in Dylan's room, he would usually wind up in our bed by about 2:00 AM. This added up to 3 people in a queen size bed and 1 of those people (can you guess who?) likes to sleep sideways in the bed. Dylan sleeping with us just recently started disturbing my sleep. (Man, that kid is getting tall.) So, I thought the best solution when he came into our room in the middle of the night would be to take him back to his room and lie down with him until he fell back asleep. Problem is, by the time he falls back asleep, I am too far-gone to make it back to our room. So, I wind up sleeping the majority of the night with Dylan.

I don't remember ever getting a solid night of sleep on my own (without the aid of medication), so maybe that is finally catching up to me. Maybe I should go in for one of those sleep study things. You know, I hardly ever dream. And, no I don't mean that I don't remember my dreams (like so many people try to convince me - why can't they believe that I would know whether or not I dreamed). When I do dream, I remember that I dreamed - maybe not what I dreamed about, but definitely the fact that I did actually dream. But I dream very rarely. Does that mean that I am not getting to the deep, recuperative sleep state? Am I only ever getting to a light sleep? Is this why I wake up so often at night? Who knows, maybe one day I will go in for that sleep study and find out. Until then, yes, I am tired.

Bribery is a good thing, but threats work too . . .

• -We bribe Dylan with 2 jelly beans every night to get him to watch a movie in his room instead of ours when we are getting him ready for bed

-We bribe Dylan with stickers and tattoos to get him to behave in any given situation

-We bribe Dylan with the ability to wear cool underwear if he will pee and poop in the potty (speaking of which, I have to go out and find some Bob the Builder underwear as a reward if he pees in the potty all day at daycare today)

-We bribe Dylan with a treat (cheap toy or special candy) if he behaves in the store

-We threaten Dylan with timeout (and follow through when needed)

-We threaten Dylan that we aren't going to see whoever he wants to see if he doesn't behave (i.e. Nana, Papa, Grandma, Poppy, Aunt Mindi, Uncle Scott, Ty)

Now, he's two and I know that he eventually needs to learn how to behave without bribery and threats, but it's working for now. (And, don't we all still react to bribery and threats just in grander forms - raises, bonuses, termination, jail).

Once he's a little older I want to establish a rewards chart. This way, he can work toward a reward for consistent good behavior. He just doesn't grasp the concept right now. I guess the reward/bribe still needs to be immediate right now.

The Power of Four

Four Jobs You've Had
1. Grocery store cashier
2. Telemarketer
3. Parts associate and cashier at a Discount Auto Parts store
4. Accountant

Four Movies You Could Watch Over and Over
1. The Usual Suspects
2. Kiss the Girls
3. Along Came a Spider
4. Serendipity

Four Places You've Lived
1. With my parents in Meigs, GA
2. In the dorm and in an apartment at college in Valdosta, GA
3. In a townhouse and then an apartment in Augusta, GA
4. At my home now in Atlanta, GA

Four TV Shows You Love To Watch
1. Desperate Housewives
2. Law and Order (all of them)
3. Grey's Anatomy
4. NCIS

Four of Your Favorite Books
1. She's Come Undone
2. Harry Potter (all of them)
3. I Know This Much Is True
4. Angels and Demons and DaVinci Code

Four Places You've Been On Vacation
1. Bahamas
2. Switzerland
3. Puerto Vallarta, Mexico
4. Las Vegas

Four Websites You Visit Daily
1. MSN
2. My Mommies Board
3. A whole bunch of blogs
4. My bank's site

Four of Your Favorite Foods
1. Pollo Rosa Maria
2. Cheese Tortellini w/ creamy pesto sauce
3. Steak and Twice Baked Potatoes
4. Sesame Chicken

Four Places You Would Rather Be Right Now
1. At home
2. In bed
3. Under the covers
4. In dreamland

I think everyone I know has been tagged.

My Childhood Powers of Reasoning

1. I used to wish on a lot of stars.




Star light, Star bright,
First star I see tonight,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have this wish I’ve wished tonight.




However, my wishes never came true. So, I came to the perfectly logical conclusion that my wishes must not be specific enough and were getting granted for someone else. So, I started making really specific wishes. These wishes were usually made on a Sunday night on my way home from church (because what better chance do you think you could have to have a wish granted than when you were returning home from spending time at church). These wishes were always for a million dollars to be waiting for me on my bed at home (and then I recited the address – this is one area that I believed the first wishes had gone wrong) that night (and then I said the date – this is another area that the first wishes could have gone wrong) when I got home from church (looking back, maybe we were just going to the wrong church – maybe the stars didn’t accept my church as a legitimate place of worship).

2. I rationalized that the way that Santa Claus could visit all the children in the world on one night was because of the time zones. I mean, if he circled the globe in the right direction, he could gain an hour for each time zone he passed through.

3. I was always really annoyed (actually, I still get annoyed) when the president would preempt my regularly scheduled programming. I had heard about these Neilson people that knew how many people were watching each show at night (though I hadn’t figured out how they knew what I was watching). So each time the president would come on to make a speech, I would repeatedly turn my TV off and on for the entire speech. I believed that somehow these Neilson people would notice that hundreds, maybe even thousands, of TV sets were turning on and finding the president making a speech and immediately turning off. I thought, at some point, these Neilson people will have to realize that no one wants to watch/listen to the president talk about whatever he was talking about. Then, surely, they will tell the TV stations that they are losing viewers left and right and my TV show would come back on. My plan hinged on the fact that the Neilson people knew when TV sets were turning on and off, what they were watching, and the fact that they couldn’t trace it to the individual set (otherwise, I would have just looked like an idiot turning my TV on and off throughout the president’s speech).

How stupid is it . . .

that I am checking my blog to see if there is anything new. I mean, I know that I haven't added anything, but I still have this urge to check to see if anything has changed.

Itchy, Itchy Me . . .

• Stop complaining, fix it or accept it.
• I do not have to take my own advice. I love to complain and I am quite good at it, if I do say so myself.
• No one owes you anything. With the exception of most medical issues, the choices you have made in your life have brought you to where you are.
• Just because you are related to someone does not entitle you to his or her possessions.
• Take care of your own stuff before you ask to borrow someone else's. If you trash what you own, why would anyone want to lend you anything.
• Just because you think someone could do something, it doesn't mean they actually can. You don't know everything that goes on in their home/head; you don't know what they could actually do. And even if they could, it doesn't mean they should feel obligated to.
• If someone is ignoring you, maybe you have done something to cause you to be ignored. If not, maybe you have annoyed the person so that they can't be civil to you so they believe ignoring you is the most polite response.
• Ask, don't assume. The answer may still be "no", but the response may be phrased more gently.
• No one wants you to be unhappy (well, most people anyway), but you are responsible for your own happiness. Until you are happy with who you are, no one else could make you happy even if they wanted to.
• Stop finding fault with everyone. Most times, the problem lies in you.
• Unless you are paying someone for those services, do not assume that anyone is your maid/waitress/caregiver.

Stream of Consciousness

So, it only 9:45 PM on a Friday night and I am the only one awake in the house. It's a little odd, actually. I need to do laundry, but just don't want to. I need to do dishes, but I absolutely refuse to. I probably should go to sleep, but I'm not really tired. I stayed home sick from work today, so I go a little extra sleep and I'm not tired. I thought I had some sort of stomach virus, but now I wonder if I just wasn't a little run down from everything that has gone on in the last couple of weeks.

My dad is staying with us for a little while. He had a pre-op appointment (for a minor surgery, nothing serious) today and will be here through the weekend. I take him to the hospital early Monday morning for his surgery and he will probably be released from the hospital sometime Wednesday. He will be staying with us until he feels that he can make the drive home (4 hours). I love him, but it is difficult to have him here for any extended period of time. He is a pretty weak, needy person and plays the "victim" a lot. He needs to be taken care of on a good day, so I am not really looking forward to caring for him after this surgery. And, I feel absolutely awful for feeling that way.

His being here (especially if it is going to be for more than a week or so) puts a strain on my marriage because Jason is easily annoyed with my dad. So, I feel like I have to work extra hard to keep Jason happy and to make sure that my dad doesn't pick up on the tension.

I am doing relatively well dealing with our recent loss of pregnancy. I know that I am not completely "okay" because the kindness of someone asking how I am doing can quickly bring on the tears as I rush to assure whoever it is that I am fine. And, I really am (or as fine as I can be under the circumstances). I truly don't believe the full extent of my emotions will be revealed until we get pregnant again. Then, I am sure the worry will outweigh the happiness and hope until we see a heartbeat. Blood tests have confirmed (as much as anything can confirm) that this pregnancy stopped developing at around 4-5 weeks. There was never a baby, only an empty sac. I was pregnant for 2-3 weeks after the pregnancy stopped. I really thought something was wrong when I hit the 6 week mark and didn't have any sign of "morning" sickness. I tried to tell myself that each pregnancy was different, but it just didn't feel right. Then, my breasts stopped be tender. About a week later is when the spotting started. The day the spotting started, I called the doctor and she actually reopened the closed office to let me see the baby on ultrasound. Until we did the ultrasound, she was certain that we would find a heartbeat and that she could reassure me with the statistic that half of women have bleeding during their pregnancies. But, we didn't see a heartbeat. All we saw was a sac that she said looked like I was about 4-5 weeks pregnant. She said that the sac looked perfectly developed and that if I was starting to miscarry, she should be able to see some sort of deformaty. At that point, we talked about dates. She tried to convince me that I could be wrong and I tried to believe it, but I just couldn't buy it. I had a positive pregnancy test in early December. If I was only 4-5 weeks pregnant, there is no way I could have had a positive pregnancy test that early. She told me to take it easy and that we might want to hold off telling the family about the pregnancy until we could come back and have some more tests. I miscarried over that weekend. I can't decide if she knew what was happening and was just trying not to ruin our Christmas or if she really didn't know. I mean the human body is an amazing thing and who is to say that in the same set of circimstances, the next pregnancy won't go on to result in a perfect baby. I don't know. There are just so many unknowns and things that I will never know about what happened. I hate not knowing. I hate uncertainty. But, I will learn to live with it. I mean, what else can I do?

I think that daycare is getting ready to try to move Dylan up to the 3 year old room. They are asking about his potty training progress and they had him visit the class today. He is nowhere near being completely potty trained and I swear that I will delay doing it if it keeps him from moving to the next class for a while. He isn't ready and he is only 2 1/2. Why do they keep trying to move my child up before he is ready. He is taller than some of the other kids in his class, but he doesn't beat them up or anything. I really hope that they just forgot how old/young he is and they will hold off for a little while. This is one move that I will fight. I never have before. The only way I will agree to it is if they are moving all of his friends at the same time. The last time they moved him, they moved him by himself and he had a horrible transition. It was awful. I can't do it again and I won't. So, there!!

Jason is working hard on his thesis (for this PhD in Educational Leadership). It has been a long road and a lot of papers (that I had to edit for him). I can't wait until he is done, though that will probably mean we will have to sell our house and move so he can get a principal's job. He has pretty much decided that he doesn't want to work in the county that we live in now. We will probably wait until he gets a job before we make any decisions about moving, but just knowing that it could happen in the next year or two makes me very anxious. I Hate Moving!!

Okay, I think that is all that is running through my mind tonight. I think that's enough anyway.